Posted by:allyssacapri

One thought on “The Subtle and Not-So-Subtle Sexism of My Big Fat Greek Wedding

  1. Well said! This movie is a favorite of mine as well, & I’m rewatching it after a long time today. I was struggling with some of the misogyny I didn’t recognize before & could hardly find anything online validating this other than your article. I just paused at the part after Ian leaves when Gus refuses to give him permission to date Toula, & Gus says, “Didn’t I say, it’s a mistake to educate women?” Geez, that’s pretty nasty, honestly.
    I still have a lot of love for this movie, but at the same time, I’m having trouble overlooking how the sexism is written off as almost endearing, & the trauma & grooming to deny their own worth, desires, & authenticity girls like Toula carry the rest of their lives goes ignored or written off. Sure, she gets to marry Ian in the end, but that doesn’t solve all of her internalized guilt, shame, & misogny inflicted by a patriarchy that is still alive & well (subtly & overtly).
    I grew up in an Indian community, & it’s taking a great deal of work to heal & retrain myself to allow me many rights & joys I’ve missed out on enjoying freely, without guilt or shame, for a long time.
    Ultimately, the movie is only reflecting reality & doesn’t deserve to be condemned. I really wish men like Gus weren’t enabled by their communities & society to rob women of their freedom to pursue their happiness as freely as men are, especially while women have been persecuted & alienated for demanding said freedom.


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